He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
