And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize