Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
