porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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