Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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