You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Randomize
