I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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