I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
