Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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