This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize