uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
