He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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