You can't motorboat a personality
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
