I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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