We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
