even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween