Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
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Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
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He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
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