i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
