oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Randomize
