I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I can tuck mytits in my pants
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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