What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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