I hate all girls vehemently.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Randomize