she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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