So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
