Christians are straight up FREAKS
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
