I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
