i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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