girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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