If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I need moral support for this bender
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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