As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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