somebody snuck up and got me drunk
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
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