he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
