Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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