I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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