the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
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