Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
