I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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