he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
