Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
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Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
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You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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