I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
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