there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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