I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
