Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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