I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
