We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
