I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
