Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Operation Purity has been aborted
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Randomize
