Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
