We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize