I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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