That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
